Yes, I am totally ruined.

It was my 39^th birthday recently and I have to admit that yes, I am totally ruined. I am a totally ruined woman.

You see, 11 years ago Jesus took me, made me His own, and ruined me for this world. 

It's not that I don't care about this world or other people, it's just that as I've journeyed with Jesus my desires have changed, and the things this world offers no longer hold the appeal they once had.

I have found total satisfaction and who I was made to be in Jesus Christ. My life has peace and purpose. My relationships are healthy and there is nothing this world can offer me that comes close to any of this...for all the world offers is tainted impurities.

When I was first born-again I could not fathom His love for me, even though I accepted it. There were times when I'd fail and wonder, “Will His love run out for me?” However I'd repent and again be amazed at His grace, learning more of His love. My life became a life of worship. I couldn't get enough of His Word and I'd sing privately to Him whenever I could, even through tears.

I will admit that often I felt incapable of truly loving Him, so I decided to show Him my love by my dedication. I received a lot of joy through Christian ministry service, but it took me many years to come to a place of really internalising His love for me, regardless of any works...But that's okay, I know He understands how broken I was and how much He needed to love me, and His love is amazingly abundant.

Over the years I became able to embrace His love, even if my comprehension of it was still immature. I was on a journey of growth. And then the difficult times came...death in many forms; my marriage died and I had friends and family pass away. I lost many human relationships but His love remained, and I let Him hold me.

He held me through my grief and panic attacks.

He held me through my tears and laughter.

He held me through my mistakes and victories.

He loved me and began to rebuild me, stronger than before. He has been replacing what the locust has destroyed in my life and here I sit totally ruined by His amazing grace and love.

His blessing of true loving relationship with Him and His people has totally ruined me for anything this world could possibly offer. I am totally His in every way and have never felt so secure.

My birthday just gone was totally amazing, I was blown away by the genuine love I felt from Him and His people. It's almost eight months since we moved interstate, and I am amazed at how loved I feel living here...No it wasn't easy moving so far away from home, and there are still challenges, but His love and miracles I witness here so often have totally ruined me for anything else...

I lay in my bed feeling settled and complete, and that in itself is a miracle. His love has brought me to a place, where I am now not willing to accept any thing less than His will and plan for my life.

My prayer for you is that you will allow Him to totally mess up and ruin your life for Him, so that you too will experience the best love as I have – that you too will know what true peace is, even in the storms life brings while awaiting His return.

Melanie.

No Moral Absolutes, Anorexia Nervosa, Faith and Other Things:

For some time, I have been thinking a lot about God's will and perfect timing; of how for our own good He will make us wait, for it is by waiting that we learn patience, endurance, and develop character through intimacy with Him. And when we persevere in patience and waiting, our faith is strengthened when we see His will for us, and perfect plan unfold before our eyes!

This week in particular I have been thinking about people who continually struggle to overcome self-inflicted, habitual problems. Our flesh is such a cruel thing which we must continually fight to lead godly lives, but victory is absolutely possible with Christ.

The Gospel is that Jesus Christ is the power of God to save. And it is not just salvation for eternity to come, it is salvation now from a dead life of sin for eternity. You see the power of God through Jesus Christ is a transforming power that takes individuals and molds them over time, more and more into the likeness of Jesus. People do not lose their unique qualities, rather they are refined to become more beautiful versions of themselves as God intended them to be, for it is then that they shine the likeness of Christ to others, through their truth and genuine love.

It is the truth of the Gospel to save and transform people, that is being lost in a world which dilutes the truth, by saying that there are no absolutes unless it comes out of the mouth of an atheist. It is why I can say to a young person fitting all the criteria for Anorexia Nervosa that they need professional help, and they basically say that my opinion of them is only my own and not necessarily right. Our young generation are being fed a whole heap of garbage and we wonder why they struggle? Our young people are not being taught to think for themselves, rather to swallow a hypothesis like a pill. Too many are told it's dangerous to believe in moral absolutes and we wonder why they struggle to make wise choices.

So many young people have no concept of working for anything much at all, and we wonder why they have no concept of repentance and faith. Both repentance and faith require action but the majority of people are too lazy to model this for our youth.

Our youth constantly get told how beautiful, loved and valued they are, but it's by a world that only flatters to use and abuse them as consumers.

When our youth get to hear the truth of the Gospel that they are not born children of God, that they need a spiritual rebirth through Jesus to be saved from their broken human state...that there is power to have their life set free from their bondage of self-inflicted, habitual problems, then progress can happen...but there is more. You see, I know people who hear this and think everything will change with one prayer and no effort on their behalf...but this is not faith.

Faith is not only believing in what we cannot see...that is only the first part. Faith is also an action – it is acting upon what we believe will happen which is why we say, “It took them a lot of faith to do that.” It is why James says faith without works is dead. It's obviously not because we are saved by anything we do, we are saved by Jesus alone, but I believe we must step out in faith in Christ's power for us to overcome to have victory over self-inflicted, habitual habits.

In the New Testament Jesus could only heal those who had faith.

I know people who continually struggle with self-inflicted, habitual habits and lament their problem/s, yet who are also unwilling to surrender them. They may understand intellectually that Christ's power is available to Christians to overcome, yet they are unwilling to have action-faith.

Yes, it is difficult during temptations to push into The Lord for His strength to overcome – that is why it is a temptation – but it is what we must do for victory. Each time it gets easier because each time our faith increases. It is difficult to patiently endure, but we will grow closer to Jesus and become stronger as we become more like Him, and have victory over our flesh. Not all healing is instantaneous, often is it a journey because The Lord wants us to draw close to Him and grow in our faith. When we forget that healing and victory requires action-faith we do not tap into His available power and will stagnate.

While we patiently endure and wait for complete victory, we can step-out each time in action-faith and grow. Yes The Lord wants to bless us with healing and victory, but do we really have faith in Him and trust Him enough to die each time to our flesh?

Love Melanie.

Abounding Grace:

I have found myself, over the past 18 months continually being brought back into fresh experiences of God's absolutely, astounding, amazing grace.

It started with me making some fresh, poor choices, and not only repenting in tears, but having to go through a process again of completely surrendering and letting go of anything clinging too close.

It wasn't easy – in fact it was tough. There were times where I felt desperate, alone and somewhat afraid, but it brought me to a place of again experiencing God's undeserved grace and power, to hearing Him clearly, and walking in His freedom.

Of late, I have been experiencing His Abounding grace through the lives of other people I have been incredibly blessed to work with. I have witnessed miracles, when simply put, the people do not deserve them. I have seen God moving powerful and people understanding this as so.

I have seen once again, God's Abounding Grace and it leads me to understand:

It is His grace that moves me to a place of desiring only His will for my life.

It is His grace that enables me to stand stubborn against temptations.

It is His grace that empowers me to love and go the extra mile.

It is His grace that encourages me to invest my personal time wisely.

It is His grace that enables me to see the unsaved as not so different to me, and in fact exactly as who I once was.....

How marvellous it is to contemplate His grace toward us whom He calls His children.

Love Melanie.