Bone from my bone, flesh from my flesh: Christian Marriage & what redefinition can't change.

This weekend I awoke around 2:30am on Sunday morning in excruciating pain.

The pain was heavy and overwhelming so much that it awoke me from sleep.

There was no way I could ignore this pain and go back to sleep for there was no position I found comfort and relief from. The pain was in my upper back between my shoulder blades, and extended down into my lower back. I felt sick and my left arm felt a bit strange.

In desperation I awoke my husband and he got me some tablets. While crying in pain and confusion, we sought some explanation from Google, as I knew I hadn’t strained it!

With my symptoms aligning with possible heart attack for a female, and the pain not easing we called for medical help. I ended up in hospital, not returning home till around lunchtime.

I was given the all-clear for any heart attack, blood clots or lung trouble, and the only thing we can think of is a likely MSG food reaction, because we’d dined Saturday evening at a local Chinese restaurant which we later found out uses MSG unless requested otherwise. My older sister is allergic to MSG and it seems most likely I am now also. After returning home I slept and slept, awaking briefly on and off. I finally felt mostly better Monday morning. I am very relieved I have been given the all-clear medically. 

The biggest benefit for me personally however has been experiencing the faithful agape love of God through my husband, as we transition through the ‘honeymoon’ period into more and more becoming one…Bone from bone, flesh from flesh. Yes, the miracle God does through the covenant of marriage, where a man and woman from different family lines, join to become one. An illustration of what all people can become with God through Jesus Christ. For through Jesus all of us who are born separated from God, can be forgiven to become members of His family. A spiritual re-birth through Jesus Christ gives us the DNA we need to be God’s children.

Family and relationship are so important to God. Jesus healed people restoring them back into their community and as a way for them to see who He was – As a testimony that He was and is, the way for them and us to become reconciled as God’s children.

My eldest son said to his brother’s today, in regards to them needing to get along better, “We share 50% of the same DNA!”

It made me think again about how important family is, and therefore the sanctity and importance of Christian marriage…especially when relationships and marriage today have become anything but godly. It made me think more about what marriage truly represents, and what any skewed perception or redefinition cannot change...

It made me think of Adam’s declaration, “Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh” and of the scriptural command for husbands to love their wife as their own body.

For me the difference between worldly relationships (which in the past I have experienced) and the ones as a Christian covenant, is the first have a value but the second ones are beyond worldly value. Let me explain…

The first type of relationship is more self-serving like a commodity…even the ones where a piece of paper is signed with the mind, rather than the heart.

A worldly relationship expires when it no longer meets the needs of one or both people.

A worldly relationship often grows cold when circumstances change.

The second relationship is a marriage where a man and woman become one. They become family and therefore loyal to each other, irrespective of circumstances. 

Just like the Christian whose life changes after becoming a child of God, a Christian covenant marriage is a permanent family-bond.

When I left home in the ambulance, my husband could not return to sleep. He stayed awake and prayed for me, flesh of his flesh, bone of his bone…his wife. When I came home and slept he continued to stay awake and care for our boys, because we are his family. 

Now I am not saying that relationships and marriages that are not Christian-covenant ones are void of commitment and love...

The most beautiful thing about a Christian covenant marriage which no law can redefine, is that when the music and glamour of the celebration fades, in Christian marriage we are left with God’s blessing of the bond of family.

Worldly relationships where one person says to another, “I will not give you……..(fill in the gap)” are not true agape love. They do not represent God’s love which welcomes us as family who share in His love, and inherit everything.

My advice to those not married is to not treat yourself as a commodity, for someone else to purchase or use. Find peace and purpose in gaining a new spiritual DNA through Jesus.

If you are a child of God, remember you are royalty, and a part of a family that is beyond all the riches of the world. Therefore walk in dignity and graciousness.

Furthermore marriage is not the most important thing in the world – Family is. Becoming a part of God’s family is the most important and therefore Christian marriage should reflect this.

Let me repeat marriage is NOT the most important thing in the world – Family is. And therefore I need to add, that as children of God – also known as the Church, or the bride of Christ – We need to treat each other as brother and sister with God’s agape love – AS FAMILY – whether we’re married or single!

When the music and glamour of good times fade, as Christians we are left with God’s blessing of the bond of family. As his children and therefore as brothers and sisters, single or married, we are family and should treat each other as such.

Christian marriage and Christian family, as a reflection of the covenant God makes with us to become His reconciled children through Jesus reflects the truth about life which no redefinition can ever change. Thanks be to God!

Love Melanie.